DIDIHOOD ~ Issue 3

Before we get into anything this month, we wanted to say a huge thank you to everyone who attended our launch on April 19 as well as The Kolkata Club for being our sponsor.

A love letter to our mothers.

Mother's Day is this month, so we thought we would dedicate this issue to the brown moms and female role models in our lives and everything they've done for us. Mother-daughter relationships can often be complicated, but if there is one thing we've learned as adults is that we would be nothing and we mean nothing, without our mothers. And while our moms are different in how they discipline, teach or inspire us, we wanted to take time to thank them for raising strong, independent and passionate women.  

To the mothers who left their homes at a young age, often newly married, to settle down in a new country and start a life completely from scratch.
To the mothers who didn't know any English but managed their way through education, work and building relationships with their second-generation children.
To the mothers who've had to battle depression, anxiety and the stresses of not only raising children, but taking care of most of the household.
To the mothers who've been victims of domestic abuse, gender-based violence or emotional trauma after living with abusive family members, and continue to.
To the mothers who've had to give up their own dreams to make sure their children got what she thought they deserved.
To the mothers who spent hours in the kitchen, perfecting every meal to make sure we still have the desire to crave home-cooked South Asian food.
To the mothers who raised us as feminists, even if they never used the word.
To the mothers who dragged ours butts to the mandirs, mosques, churches and gurdwaras to make sure we had some idea of where we came from.
To the mothers who treated their daughters like their sons, even when culture told them not to.
To the mothers who never got a chance to grieve loss, because the world is often on their shoulders.
To the mothers who continued to put up with us, even when we rebelled, talked back or cursed under our breath, we're thankful.

Meet the Didis: 

This month we have a Q&A with artist Vivek Shraya, a Didi we have been fans of for years. She has several books, films and albums (serious triple threat) and her latest book, I'm Afraid of Men, is out this Fall. 

Tell us about your latest project: 
I'm Afraid of Men explores my relationship with masculinity — as someone that was chastised for not being masculine enough as a child, and therefore coerced into and adopting masculinity as a means of survival, and then rejecting masculinity in coming out as trans, but still having to encounter the violence of masculinity.

How much of your culture is intertwined with your art?
My brownness is inseparable from my art, especially as someone who regularly draws on my life experience and history in my work. My brownness has manifested in my art in a range of ways including reimagining Hindu mythology in my novel She of the Mountains, poetry about white supremacy in my collection even this page is white, and honouring my mother in my photo series Trisha. I also frequently collaborate with other South Asian artists including Rajni Perera, Hatecopy, and my brother Shamik.

How important is it for POC to have a space to express themselves artistically?
So much of my art production has been created in response to the lack of POC visibility, especially in relation to the intersections of my race with my gender and sexuality. Unfortunately, this has often meant that my work has been categorized as "niche" but as an artist, my duty is to stay faithful to what inspires me and what social responsibilities I have as a brown artist, regardless of how these may or may not limit how and where my art circulates.
 
 What is your advice for other Didis who want to write a book one day?
Develop a consistent writing practice. A lot of people want to write books but don't write! Write a great book, one that you are proud of. Get feedback from other writers on your book. Pay attention to who is publishing books and become familiar with their submission policies.
 
 What we're reading:

South Asian women are finally receiving the representation they deserve in media, but we have a long way to go. Prajakta Dhopade's piece in This explores how the media landscape has changed for SA women, and if this success is just a phase (we sure hope not).

Our Didi Ishani Nath wrote this great piece on what it means to wear Indian jewelry for Flare magazine (which features quotes from several Didis, including our very own Roohi Sahajpal).  

Bengali women filmmakers who have made India proud: As a takeaway this month, we really appreciate this piece in The Times of India, highlighting some amazing Bengali women in film.

Our hearts mourned last month as we read the names of each victim of Toronto's deadly van attack. There was one name, Renuka Amarasingha, a single mother from Sri Lanka who was killed on the first day of her job, that completely broke us (you can support Amarasingha's 7-year old son here).

What we're watching:

Alright, we've already posted this trailer on our social media pages, but we can't seem to get enough of it. Veere Di Wedding is basically Bollywood's answer to Bridesmaids, a coming of age story of four childhood female friends. Seriously, the cursing in the trailer is enough for checkmarks in our books.

-- Arti Patel

Upcoming Events:

June Panel
To kick off our first panel of 2018, we want to focus on the media's representation of South Asian women and what it means to be a South Asian woman in these spaces. Through narratives from women in film, journalism, arts and academia, we hope to create a larger conversation of some of the industry's biggest struggles and triumphs. Stay tuned for a 'Save The Date' on social media!

Issue 3

Follow us on Instagram, Twitter & Facebook 
[email protected]